First Prize: (and winner of the Jeanette Stace Memorial Prize): Sophia Frentz (Tauranga) - stolen lunchtime

Second Prize: Sophia Frentz (Tauranga) - last dance

Third Prize: Devon Gurney-Meehan (Christchurch) - the tree's reflection

Fourth Prize: Margaret Reed (Christchurch) - sitting still

Fifth Prize: Cathy Reimer (Christchurch) - Devils' fingers

Highly Commended:

Courtney Barr (Christchurch): ‘power lines buzz'; Harry Frentz (Tauranga): ‘my face reflected'; Sophia Frentz (Tauranga): ‘autumn leaves'; Ashleigh Goh (Christchurch): ‘midnight my cupcake full'; Ben Jenkins (Christchurch): ‘I close the gate'; Jacoba Kinley (Christchurch): ‘flax bushes'; Charlotte Trevella (Christchurch): ‘spider's web'; Felicity van der Pol (Christchurch): ‘moon'; Sam Verdellen (Christchurch): ‘full moon'.

Commended:

Matilda Boyce (Christchurch): ‘traffic jams'; Jared Chin (Christchurch): ‘midnight'; Jessica Duston (Westport): ‘the spaniel's shadow'; Sophia Frentz (Tauranga): ‘old table'; Kimberley Gee (Christchurch): ‘a recycle truck waits'; William Habgood (Christchurch): ‘on a still night'; Danielle Lusk (Westport): ‘jandals float'; Ayreton Macdonald (Westport): ‘smoke rises'; Charlotte Trevella (Christchurch): ‘empty seat'; Felicity van der Pol (Christchurch): ‘snow'. Special Mention: James Criglington (Christchurch): ‘the little old frog'.

Judge's Report:

Judging this year's junior haiku/senryu was a most enjoyable task. There were over 800 entries on a wide variety of themes. There are many interpretations of what makes a good haiku, from the strict traditional syllable count through to the more arcane elements such as wabi, sabi and yugen. (I would recommend that serious students google these terms) My own take is that a good haiku expresses the essence of a moment in a breath. The best of them relive or conjure that moment to the ears or eyes of the listener or reader. The more we know of that moment the more we are in tune with that moment. I am happy to report that a good percentage of the submitted works can be regarded as haiku and about half of the entries were good efforts. Some failed however by being merely descriptive or just simple statements. However, some of these were quite good little poems in their own right. Some of the submissions used unnecessary words, usually to make up a syllable count of seventeen and this often detracted from what were otherwise good haiku. I did note there was a huge disparity in the sophistication of the work presented. Some of the haiku were obviously written by senior students and some by real youngsters. I would like to give a special commendation to one handwritten & illustrated haiku by perhaps our youngest entrant [James Criglington]. His/her haiku while obviously a familiar yet new take on perhaps the most popular haiku of all time gives us a wonderful picture of the author's delight in his recent understanding of the art form:

the little old frog
sat on the black wonky bridge
splash! Splash! silence there [. . .]

First Prize really stood out from the rest. A very simple and elegant senryu with a strong sense of yugen:

stolen lunchtime
I count
his piercings

There is a sense of mystery in this poem. The writer is surreptitiously counting someone's piercings whilst engaged in another activity that is not strictly on the agenda. The poem evokes two provocative questions. Is the agenda the poet's or is it someone else's? Is the poet perhaps offended by the piercings or secretly admiring them? This is a very good example of the term shasei (meaning ‘sketching from life'). There is much subtlety here. The portrait is immediate yet remains mysterious while retaining an element of grace and contemplation.

Second Prize has similar elements of mystery. Here we find the natural impermanence of things as they really are:

last dance
my perfume
almost gone

We also find the notion that something is incomplete and a hint of decay. This poem brings forth an emotional response that immediately links us to the moment and the poet herself.

Third Prize gives us a clear image of a picture presented when the natural world collides with humanity:

the tree's reflection
wobbled as gumboots
splashed on concrete

This haiku offers immediacy and we can sense the fun and the pleasure involved. I would however suggest that these elements would be more immediate if the poem were written in the present tense!

Fourth Prize is a haiku that has a simple beauty:

sitting still
beside a window
sunlight reflects blind eyes

Here we find tranquility - an ease and a beauty with something that otherwise may be seen as imperfect. There is the contrast between the bright sun-filled world and the dark inner world of the sightless one who yet observes the sun through other senses. There is also an unspoken empathy with the object of the poem.

Fifth Prize is a humorous reminder to many of us of our schooldays:

Devils' fingers
tempt insects into
Venus fly traps

I especially like the sound of this poem. The ‘v's the ‘l's the ‘i's and the ‘t's all combine wonderfully here to help provide a dark edge to the poem. I am sure that most who read this poem will remember being there.


Linzy Forbes, June 2009


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